Weapons are used by superheroes to accomplish a specific goal, such as hitting someone over the head, persuading feeble-minded prey to do one’s bidding, or just blowing up a planet. That’s what useful weapons accomplish, and so much more!
There are other weapons that whistle, fart, and discharge wads of worthless slime. These are the ones that are difficult to use or do not operate at all. Or they’re superfluous and take up important space in the adventure pack. They’re the type of weaponry that has no legitimate function in the DC world.
Check out these five DC Comics weapons that you probably wouldn’t even wanna be caught dead with!
5. Hawkgirl’s Dart Gun
Hawkgirl’s skill with weapons is excellent, and when combined with the badass mace she usually carries about, she is a powerful hero. Her mace and belt, made of the great and mystical Nth metal, allow her to fly, give her incredible strength, and shield her from the elements. She wields her mace with deft dexterity and lethal skill, leaving her opponents cringing and crying in her wake.
She also possesses a dart pistol capable of knocking someone unconscious for five minutes.
The “magazine-fed semi-automatic crossbow with a pistol grip” dart gun, designed by a rehabilitated weapons trader to beef up Hawkgirl’s armory before a great cosmic conflict, seems like it might screw someone up. But, in the end, it only promotes a brief slumber, something her mace could achieve with a simple touch.
4. Joker’s Joy Buzzer
The Joker’s most famous weapon during the Golden Age was the Joy-Buzzer, a device in his hand that would inject 200 volts into a victim’s system, potentially resulting in… unconsciousness! But things change, and ugly, agonizing death is the norm. To that aim, the contemporary Joker has increased the voltage of his novelty weapon to 50,000V, which is enough to convert a person’s brain into a steak.
However, regardless of voltage, the Joy Buzzer’s narrow scope makes it an unpleasant and unsafe device to use. For starters, it can only kill one person at a time; even if it could deliver more than a single shock, you couldn’t back-slap everyone in a crowd before people notice. It’s also quite close-ranged: face-to-face, you’ll smell your victim’s breath before striking. Sure, it’s as personal as murder gets, but it’s also a significant and unnecessary danger. Even the crowbar he used to bash Jason Todd’s head in offered him some separation from the kid’s flailings.
3. Green Arrow’s Boxing Glove Arrow
Green Arrow’s Boxing Glove appears in comic books. Arrow is one of Ollie’s favorite go-to shows. But it’s difficult to explain his attachment to this object: it’s a boxing glove on a stick. The weapon appears awkward in the comics’ form, and it must take up a lot of space in the quiver. You can bet threading the thing is a pain in the a** as well. In terms of combat effectiveness, a boxing glove is not aerodynamic, and if it is going to knock someone out, it must be heavy. As a result, it’s not the best long-range weapon.
Yes, it works and can give a nice knock-out punch from a distance (somehow), but it’s just a rip-off of the multi-functional Batarang and is far too inefficient and impractical to be genuinely useful.
2. Canary’s Cry Bomb
Experimenting with powerful sound vibrations from your lips isn’t simply something humans do in public parks and fine dining establishments. These oral disruptions, when combined with Black Canary’s superpower, maybe a deadly weapon, incapacitating masses of adversaries and shattering physical impediments. If you truly irritate her, she’ll smash your blasted head.
A deadly weapon and astounding power. For its non-augmented heroes, the Arrow television series converts that power into a practical explosive. But there’s no need for Dinah Drake to throw one of them into the mix in the comics. Her Canary Cry already has a broad range, so there’s no need to toss a bomb when you can just open wide and let those destructive vibrations soar.
1. Batman’s Female-Villain Repellant
Female-Villain Repellent, a relatively recent addition to Batman’s arsenal of non-cosmetic sprays, gels, and explosives, is apparently a sarcastic one-time jest. Let us all pray.
Besides, it’s pointless. To begin with, sprays have a limited range. Second, it is well known that when sprayed in the face with an aerosol can, individuals cover their eyes and lips. Plus, Batman would have to carry two spray cans, one for females and one for men, and we’re assuming the Bat-Utility Belt is already tight on room. And what if he was caught among a swarm of male and female villains? You must use both hands, spray each adversary individually, and hope that they do not just turn their head or back up a few paces.
Let the scent of this weapon blow away in the air, will we?